3 Signs You Lack Discipline (and an Unconventional Way to Build It)
We hear a lot about discipline nowadays – productivity hacks, morning routines, “just do it” mindsets. Most discipline practices focus on force and willpower. Mine focuses on why you lost it in the first place. Without having to call yourself out, here are three different indicators that you’re not just undisciplined – you’re in need of some deeper work.
How to Know You Need More Discipline
1. Procrastination is Your Favorite Game to Play
Pushing things off again and again or waiting until the very last minute of a deadline. Something about it makes you feel alive right? The thrill, the nerves. It’s exciting to see if we can outdo ourselves with our last-minute work this time around.
Excitement aside, maybe you don’t mean to do this all the time. Something could be extremely important to us, but we still seem to procrastinate. Urgent tasks pop up left and right, and next thing we know, the important task has been sidelined. The unintentional procrastination is even worse – it results in looming anxiety.
Regardless, procrastination is a common behavioral pattern, and it’s definitely a tell-tale sign something needs to change.
2. You Accept “Lazy” as a Personality Trait
Now I know it is common for our parents to call us this, or someone who judges our behavior, or even ourselves when we’re comparing our lives to countless others. We identify with it because it is so common to see around us. So many signs point to lazy town that we eventually accept it as true. And when we do that, it’s game over.
You see, when we accept it as our truth, we stop trying to fight it. We tell ourselves that it’s not worth the effort to try to change. Or maybe, it’s so comfortable that we don’t recognize why we should try to fight the laziness. There are loads of successful people that do the bare minimum, right? You can make it work for you.
In reality, we’re missing out on growth and progress when we settle for titles and identities like this one.
3. You Quit the Things That Matter Most
This one might touch a nerve, but let’s be honest with ourselves for second. When was the last time you saw something through to the end? And I mean the real end of it. Not just when you lost motivation, or when things got hard. Or when you convinced yourself, you probably won’t make it anyways, so just give up right now. Can’t technically fail if you didn’t give it your all.
Now, you can live a seemingly accomplished life while still embodying quitter tendencies. There are some things that come easy to you. And they’re typically the low-lying fruit. The goals that you settle for. That’s the difference.
We quit the things that matter most to us because it would hurt a lot more if we’re not successful in them.
We become accustomed to these patterns in our lives that we almost don’t realize the transformation we have the power to make.
The Unconventional Way to Build Discipline
You haven’t recognized the need to do anything about these behaviors because it’s comfortable here. It’s the norm. You know how to navigate it. You are familiar with the frustration, anger, bitterness, or disappoint that comes with these patterns. It’s easy.
We zoom in and stay focused on the particular outcome that we didn’t achieve this time or the progress we lost this time. But this time feels just like the last time, and the time before that, and the time before that. So, we’re used to it. We know what it feels like to feel like a failure, or lazy, or a loser. And we’ve convinced ourselves that this is the way things will always be.
Once again, it’s comfortable here, with those feelings. That’s why you don’t think to question it. But now is the time to question it.
When you start looking around, a lot of sources say things like – make a plan, manage your time, force yourself to follow through, just do more. And I absolutely despise this. It’s not practical. They’re band aid fixes for the deeper problem.
I refuse to believe that you’re just a procrastinator, or you’re just lazy, or you’re just a quitter. These are the external behavioral patterns that stem from something far more important. They stem from outdated beliefs, trauma experienced at a younger age, and a lack of tools to overcome and recognize the real obstacles.
Address the root of the behavior and you become unstoppable. Nothing holds you back, keeps you stagnant, or stops you from finishing. You become limitless.
That is my unconventional approach. Identify the root belief, heal that part and rewrite the story, and learn tools to manage limiting thoughts that show up in the future.
I’ll use myself as an example. On the road to starting my business, I experienced a plethora of doubtful thoughts. If I was the type of person to do this, if I was capable of building something successful, if I was worthy of the success. All these thoughts have one thing in common – they all root back to fear. Fear has many different voices it uses to keep us “safe” where we are. I addressed this fear head on, created a new story to operate on, and found ways to work with my fear instead of against it.
Questions to Take With You
I’d like to offer what I consider the practical advice for my outlook on discipline. Two things you can do right now to start your journey of building a stronger discipline practice.
1. Question everything. Your procrastination, your laziness, your quitting. Nothing is ever what it seems, and curiosity towards our own behaviors is always our best friend. It helps us discover the Why behind the behavior.
2. Dream big. What goal do you want to see yourself accomplish next? What could your future look like if you make it happen? What could your future look like if you don’t make it happen? Both are important to think about, it shows us just how much we truly want the goal.
The Next Step
If you’re ready to learn more about how to transform these behaviors and unlock your limitlessness, I have a free ebook that describes more of the how-to. You can get your free copy here.
If you’ve read all you need and you’re ready to jump right into the work that needs to be done, I have a workshop on discipline starting September 28, 2025. You can learn more about it here.
You weren’t born undisciplined. You learned survival patterns somewhere along the line, and they no longer serve you. If you’re ready to rewrite your story, I’d love to be the one to guide you through that transformation.
Warmly,
Meg
Peaceful Heretic
